Sex ed..... Why me???

This is a demonstration I'm supposed to do to show how HIV is transmitted....

Directions: Gather the following items:
cornstarch
plastic wrap
water
two twist ties
two glass beakers
iodine
a large needle

Place cornstarch inside two pieces of plastic wrap. Secure the plastic-wrapped bags at the top with twist ties. Make sure the cornstarch does not leak out. Use a needle to make several holes in one of the bags. Place each bag of cornstarch into a glass beaker filled with water. Be sure the top of the bags stays out of the water to prevent leakage into the beaker. Put several drops of iodine into the water of each beaker.

rest

this is one of those lessons i never learn...

i don't find enough time to rest because i'm so busy striving for what i think will make me happy. i'm learning that my number one sin is perfectionism. i ask so much of myself and don't allow for room to trust in God. not that i meet my impossible standards, anyway. but i always think i can if i just try hard enough.

"the Lord is my Shepherd, i shall not want..."

funny, i ask more of myself than God asks of me.

trusting in God is what i'm learning, through giving myself more grace and less expectations. through spending more time with God and less time making everything perfect. spending more time on things that really matter - my spiritual health, relationships, taking time to enjoy my life.

hmm... is watching the 2 hour season finale of 24 considered rest?

spiritual meat 'n' potatoes

i had an official kick in the butt this past sunday at church. my pastor preached a sermon for all time - about really, the simplest thing in the world, devotional time with God. the analogy he used involved two people. each day of the week, they each took a step - the one committed to reading his bible and spending time with God in the direction of God's will. and the other, careless about devotions, in a direction away from God's will. and day by day, one got closer to God's will and the other further.

it isn't about profound spiritual revelations and miracles, it's about day-to-day dependency on God.

i want to justify that my inconsistency in daily devotions is my ridiculously busy workload. but i know that if pursuing God was really my first priority, the work and the worry wouldn't be an issue.

the few days since that sermon have been like coming home after years abroad. i've been spending time in the Word and prayer at least once a day, and God has been really good to show me so many things to give me wisdom, peace, and hope. everyone should try it, really!

most of all, i'm so glad that God is so patient in my meanderings. and so willing to welcome me with open arms.

my new fave/obsession: millionaire matchmaker!

i can't believe i have never seen this show before yesterday. it was a little shocking at first, because patty, the matchmaker, is really blunt, like in a edgy new york way. but then, after i got past her bluntness, i started being really impressed with her insightfulness about relationships, and what men and women what from relationships - and most of the time, more clearly than the people themselves. it's also really fun to watch the guys and gals go on dates, or meet people, and try to guess how they're going to choose.

what have i learned about myself? it's interesting.... i've learned that i'm a pretty good catch, actually.... it's weird saying that, especially on a blog. but i guess i was never really convinced of that.

i wish patty was my friend or something so she can give me personalized advice.... although karen is very good at giving advice, and screening guys for me! although i don't think i could date any of the guys on the show..... ::shudder::

god's got someone for me... i gotta believe!

what was that?!

thanks for all your love and prayers... i don't really know what that weirdness was for those few days... but i think there was some kind of spiritual darkness that made me feel like i was still fighting off depression... which if you're my friend, you know that it was the biggest mountain in my life until a few years ago.

so tuesday night, at choir/ band practice, chrissy shared about song of songs 2:6 "his left arm is under my head, and his right arm embraces me" and that the lord's left arm lifts up our head and gives us joy, and his right arm covers us and protects us... and just a sweet time of prayer and face time with god lifted that darkness. i know it was lifted because today i woke up singing the song we learned last night, and i had a decently good day at school... which is mercies from heaven.

i'm just really thankful for my awesome friends and family, and a god who gives us joy and covers us in our weakness.

request for prayer

i'm asking for prayer from those of you who believe in the power of prayer...

for some reason, some demons from my past are surfacing... stuff i thought i had beat and moved passed... and it's really getting me down and discouraged. it's all in my mind... and i want to have a spiritual mindset, like pastor was talking about on sunday. it's also causing me physical discomfort - nausea, headaches...

i'm trying to muster up the strength to fight...

please give me your point of view...

this blog started off really deep... and while i still have deep thoughts once in a while, i have to share my funny stories when they happen.

so last week, i gave a test to my students on a novel we've been reading - the maldonado miracle, and one of the questions was, "What is the point of view this story is told in?" because we learned about first and third person narration.

one of my students answered, "Excellent."

i marked it, "Incorrect."